Its no secret that being in a relationship with someone you love and care about isnt all that easy. At least, not ALL the time.

Things may have started great and awesome and its very possible you thought that the two of you would forever be happy, no matter what.

Unfortunately, after a while reality kicks in. Believe it or not, theres a BIG percentage of couples that go to relationship counseling while theyre still together.

That said, if you fall into that category, here are a few things for you to consider when it comes to seeing a counselor.

First, youve got to realize that while relationship counseling CAN help the relationship, a counselor is not a miracle-worker.

That means YOU and YOUR PARTNER are going to have to put in some effort and work at it. All the relationship counselor can do is listen to both of you with a neutral perspective and then offer good suggestions for mending your relationship based on your issues.

Now, for relationship counseling to work, BOTH of you need to want to save the relationship.

It cant be a one-sided thing. Whats more, you need to go to counseling with a spirit of cooperation.

So there shouldnt be a competition to see whos right and whos wrong.

If thats an issue, then the counselor can help bring down any walls youve put up to protect yourself from getting hurt or feeling vulnerable.

One aspect of relationship counseling that youll need to be weary of more fighting.

It sounds counterintuitive, but its normal to argue MORE after your first few sessions of
counseling because youve FINALLY brought issues to the surface and have expressed how you each feel.

This can lead to hurt feelings and resentment at first, because youre still learning ways to
communicate with each other and do conflict resolution.

But if thats the case, no need for alarm. Things WILL get better so long as you keep going
to relationship counseling.

Many times, however, the first few sessions of counseling may be all your relationship needs. Thats because just having a third party listen to you and validate your feelings can be VERY therapeutic for the both of you.

One more thing instead of seeing a counselor at all, could you just use a relationship self-help book to try and fix your relationship problems?

Its possible. But to start, you should definitely see a counselor. This will set things on the right foot. Later on, once youve learned some methods to resolve conflict and communicate better, then you can try doing it yourself with the advice inside books.
Of course, the biggest thing here is that your relationship WILL NOT improve, even if you DO go to relationship counseling, if you dont put in the effort and take action.

This may sound like common sense, but too many couples fall trap to this. So if your relationship is a bit on the rocky side, definitely look into relationship counseling.

It can really help and keep your relationship happy, passionate, fun and exciting!