I heard Mr.
Ross - a Middle East envoy and chief peace negotiator for both the Bush and Clinton administrations, and now back on the job on the Obama team- speak a while back and purchased his book.
When I read chapter 9, Negotiations of "Statescraft And How to Restore America's Standing in the World", I thought more of the book as "Salescraft And How to Restore Your Buyer's Confidence and Improve the Effectiveness of Salespeople".
In the chapter he lists several rules of negotiation.
Here's an insight from a sales consultant who has been there and successfully used "Tough love is also required.
" Let me illustrate with a story first.
I had a mixed breed dog (okay, it was a mutt my family fell in love with and rescued from a kennel) who loved to run after tennis balls and sticks.
She would crouch with her back end high in the air, her front legs bent close to the ground, ready to spring forward, with her head tilted up, eyes glaring at me, and bark, and growl with her lips curled back, bearing her teeth until I picked up a stick or ball and tossed it.
And, she would keep doing this until she was ready to stop.
There came a time when I was ready to stop and she wasn't.
So I showed her the stick, faked the throw, and watched her take off after something that wasn't there.
After a while searching for the stick that wasn't there, she would come back and go into her crouching routine again.
So, I pretended to throw the stick again.
By the third time, she got the message and settled down to quietly chew on another stick.
Don't get me wrong.
I loved playing with my dog.
It's just that it was not always a convenient or appropriate time to play- like when there were very small children around, or when she was barking while I was on the phone.
How often do you find yourself playing the role of golden retriever rather than that of the sales executive during a sales process? Does your prospect always have just one more request? Again.
Maybe it's one more piece of information.
Maybe it's another referral.
Maybe it's another look at your product...
for himself or for someone else just entering the process.
Maybe it's another price reduction.
And like a good dog you go fetch.
And fetch.
And fetch.
And fetch.
And fetch.
Next time, before you go fetch yet again, ask yourself if you have supplied your prospect everything reasonable (and maybe even a few unreasonable things) she needs to make a decision.
If you can honestly say, "Yes", and only when you can honestly say "Yes", let your prospect know it.
If there's some doubt in your mind...
then you're stuck.
Go fetch.